March 30, 2009 Issue 45•14
STOCKHOLM—In recognition of her groundbreaking work treating life- threatening diseases of the privates, renowned hoo-ha specialist Dr. Victoria Lazoff was awarded the Nobel Prize in Lady Medicine this week.
The world's foremost authority on ailments down south, Lazoff led a team of cutting-edge hoo-ha doctors to develop new strategies for detecting abnormal growth in...you know, that area. The accomplished physician humbly accepted medicine's highest honor before a crowd of her peers, and spoke about the importance of regular screenings to prevent unnecessary complications up inside one's business.
"Recent advancements have brought us closer than ever to eliminating this threat, but early detection is still our best defense," said Dr. Lazoff, who earned a doctorate in lady parts from Johns Hopkins University. "I thank you all for this great honor, which I hope will finally bring the world's attention to the serious matter of [hoo-ha] disease."Attendees said Lazoff then presented a number of slides pertaining to the, uh, nether-type zone.
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